i always wanted
to write as easily and spontaneously
as bukowski-
thousands of poems
forty or fifty collections
with
weird & wacky titles
like
sometimes you get so alone that it just makes sense
or
the days run away like wild horses over the hills
or
burning in water drowning in flame
or
play the piano drunk like a percussion instrument until
the fingers begin to bleed a bit
but
i have lived a life that was way too carefully planned
& structured
never got totally pissed on booze or woke up with the hangovers
banging in the head-
had too few pills
& way too few lines
spent too much time entangled in one job
did not play the horses often enough
or
traded in listed shares
did not come off second best too often
with the whores, the courts, in hospital or heartbreak hotels
i lost my heart way way too late-
in order to be a successful writer
(according to charles bukowski, the master)
you had to have slept with
many women,
beautiful women...
and you should have written one or two
decent love poems:
i think i am half way there.
